so
tonight i asked an empty street if love exists.
my life, tumbl'd.
Dec 19
Dec 17
Jesus Christ I'm Funny
- me: indeed. wow. have you seen idiocracy?
- autumnashby: YES!
- me: ok, you know the montage where the stupid people procreate like crazy?
- autumnashby: Yes.
- me: so i'm looking at this wedding from this dood who i went to hs with on the old facebook and it's clearly taking place in some sort of firehall or vfw and i know he's already got like two kids, and this broad he's marrying has a couple and to look at the two of them you'd be shocked to learn that either of them breathe through their noses with ease and i start to realize, looking at this wedding, as a barren, single fella in his 30's, that it's sorta like watching that montage....in real time
- autumnashby: LOL
Oct 30
Oct 08
Sep 23
Sep 15
Sep 10
Sep 02
so emo
since i’m feeling very emo lately, i’ve decided to channel my white boy man pain into a really bad idea. that really bad idea being rap. i’m going to sample the whitest songs i can find and rap in the least rhythmic drone possible about how much my heart hurts. first up, a song sampling the beginning of this song:
doesn’t get much whiter than that.
Sep 01
Jul 30
- me: explain to me again how twilight vampires can go in the sun?
- Sent at 2: 55 PM on Thursday
- Colleen: the can go in
- but
- wait for it
- they sparkle
- and it would give away their secret
- me: but they're vampires
- Colleen: so?
- me: VAMPIRES CAN'T GO IN THE FUCKIN SUN
- Colleen: silly greg
- me: it's like rule 1, maybe 2 after drinking blood
- Colleen: that's just a myth
- me: i'm tumbling this, as proof to my unborn, never to be born children that i did not get down with this shit when it was popular, and that i was a vampire purist...should the topic ever arise
Jul 25
Jul 20
a list
that i may have use for at some point in the near future, maybe:
blazing saddles
gets dylan
doesn’t like bad movies
[more to come]
Jun 12
Free Books (for facebook)
FREE BOOKS
In, what will no doubt be a fruitless effort, to declutter my life a bit, I’m getting rid of some books. I’m way too lazy to be bothered with selling or trading them, and I hate to think of them gathering dust in a charity shop. As such, I’m offering them here on the old facebook before I cart them off.
Take a look at the list and email me if you want anything. Obviously it’s way more convenient for me if live in or around the greater philadelphia area. If you don’t, we can probably figure something out though. So seriously, email me, take these shits. Help curb my compulsion to hoard before I become one of those people who gets buried and dies in an avalanche of their own stuff and doesn’t get found for weeks.
The books are (in alpha order by author)
henderson the rain king saul bellow
the tortilla curtain tc boyle
ham on rye charles bukowski
junky william burroughs
dry augusten burroughs
the amazing adventures of kavalier and clay michael chabon
the mysteries of pittsburgh michael chabon
eleanor rigby douglas coupland little shit nommed on this a bit
the brief and wonderful life of oscar wao junot diaz
paddy clark, ha ha ha roddy doyle
snapper roddy doyle
the van roddy doyle
the woman who walked into doors roddy doyle
foucaults pendulum umberto eco
go down moses william faulkner
sanctuary william faulkner
a fable william faulkner
requiem for a nun william faulkner
broom of the system david foster wallace
brief interviews with hideous men david foster wallace
american gods neil gaiman
the motorcycle diaries che guevara rough shape
a letter to a christian nation sam harris
a long way down nick hornby
the elementary particles michel houellebecq
the doors of perception aldous huxley
world according to garp john irving
lake wobegon days garrison keillor
sailor song ken kesey
darkness at noon arthur koestler
the unbearable lightness of being milan kundera
fortress of solitude jonathan lethem
the razor’s edge w somerset maugham
atonement ian mcewan
amsterdam ian mcewan
beloved toni morrison
thus spoke zarathustra friedrich nietzsche
snow orhan pamuk
the moviegoer walker percy
ishmael daniel quinn
one day in september simon reeve
portnoy’s complaint philip roth
human stain philip roth
everything is illuminated jonathan safran foer dog chewed a bit
extremely loud and incredibly close jonathan safran foer
blindness jose saramago
the braindead microphone george saunders
fast food nation eric schlosser
leaves of grass walt whitman
the professor and the madman simon winchester
revolutionary road richard yates
